The Waiting…

Whenever you come in my head, it breaks my heart;
And whenever you come into my dreams, it breaks me apart;
I’m not sure if I can handle, this all is a lot;
I can’t find the peace that I need to last.

I don’t think it’s you,
It’s just me all over the place.
All these issues pile up day after day.

I know they have reasons,
I understand it all.
But what they don’t know is
they all leave me alone.

I can’t stop thinking of the “ifs” and “buts”;
I can’t help feel what it might be like to find trust;
I can’t stop thinking what it’ll be if you’re here;
I can’t help believing it’s all my fault, here and there.

All the time I cry, sinking in my sorrow;
Looking at the hourglass, as time turns me hollow;
I need to feel alright, I need someone to talk to;
I need to be alright, but sadness always comes to my rescue.

I know it’s a lot,
And I understand you don’t care.
But sometimes I want things to be
about me and not them.

So I just keep writing
Words that drown my tears,
So that someday I will be
Strong enough to face my fears.