Shamed…

She said I shouldn’t ”act” pretty,
It might attract people who’ll harm me;
She said I shouldn’t ever talk about love,
It’s stupid, not needed to form a family;
She told me never to state my opinion,
It doesn’t need a voice, it doesn’t matter to the world;
She told me never to answer back,
With questions, or my curiosity, there’s no need for words.

She made me feel my body was a curse,
That I shouldn’t talk about my physical and emotional parts;
She shamed every colossal change through my life,
That these should be discussed never in time;
She made me feel I was inferior
To my depression and her snarky laugh;
She did all she can
To break me apart;
And She nearly succeeded,
I’m still recovering from my traumatic past.

 

Featured Image –

http://shynesssocialanxiety.com/socially-awkward/

 

Drastic…

When I sleep I think I can rewind things,
When I wake up I realize it’s not true;
Every time I blink, I wish it never happened,
But now your songs keep reminding me of you…

If all my tears and sadness can bring you back,
I’d rather keep missing you all my life;
I didn’t know you enough to explain these feelings,
But I bet someone who did is still crying by your side.

I’ll miss you, always and forever.
RIP Chris Cornell

Dreams…

Sometimes things just seem so beautiful when they’re locked up in the garage,
Sometimes dreams just seem pretty when their locked up in our heads;
We’re all so tired of excuses but not tired of big dreams,
But we’re so lazy that we’d give up passion for a bit of sleep…

The Review: Jonathan Livingston Seagull…

Yes, Jonathan Livingston Seagull was no ordinary bird indeed. Jonathan was passionate, strong-willed, curious, consistent, hard working, and a bird who wished to spread his love for flying across all souls.

See, Jonathan loved to fly. And while no one else in his flock would understand Jon’s love for it, so nobody cared. They believed him to be crazy, ostracized him, and later on, left him all alone as an outcast. But what hurt Jonathan Livingston Seagull was not being alone, but the fact that nobody wanted to learn, to experiment, to understand flight. So he dedicated his life to his passion, and led a peaceful and a beautiful life practicing flight all his life.

When he entered a different world, he further refined his skills in flight and learned from the best in that flock. He learned that the power of one’s will and imagination exceed that of time and space; and wished to spread this message to all the other outcasts in other worlds, who need someone who understands them, just like he did long ago. Jon taught his love for flight and helped many others like him and soon, as times passed by, became a legend. Though he was remembered, his teachings seem to be forgotten and the passion for flight no longer seemed to exist…only for Jon to return once again and help those one in a million curious and passionate seagulls like him.

I truly thank Mr. Richard Bach for producing this book, for making it a part of my life, and for making me believe that I can actually fly.

This book taught me that I can truly be want I want to be and nothing in the world can stop that. If I believe in myself enough, practice my heart out, and never give up, I can be everything I want to be. As Jon says, fear, anger and boredom are the only things standing in your way. If you can overcome that, you’re free. Furthermore, this book also taught me that it doesn’t matter if you’re all alone in your venture, till the time you believe in yourself, in what you’re doing and push beyond your limits, you’re invincible…you’re beyond time and space.

So, if you’re willing to work for your goals, your wishes, your passion, know that you are free and nothing can stand in your way.

Perfection does not have limits.

 

The Usual Cacophony…

We’re all tired of being lonely,
But don’t want to ever be found.
We just want someone to want us,
And to reject them inside out.
We’re crazy when we have to be,
But judge people in a crowd.
We’re hypocritical assholes,
But see heaven in the clouds.
We want so much out of our lives,
But prefer the usual nothingness.
We can’t stand up for ourselves,
But want someone else to do it.
We are pathetic when it comes
To being social organisms;
‘Cause unlike all the others,
We’d rather slit our throats in this competition.

The Glitch Factor…

There are times when we feel very alone, not physically, but in our thoughts and feelings. We feel people don’t understand us, that we are too “different” to be understood.

Instead of spinning about the same old thing, we are way too ‘out of the box’ for people to understand. And then people start to ostracize us.

Since people like things to fall within their comfort zone, they tag every mutant thought as ‘weird’. And then, it is us who become the ‘weird’ people, the iconoclasts, and the rebels. But what I would like to stress upon is the fact that I AM HAPPY ABOUT THIS.

The last thing anyone going through a personal experience wants to hear is another person saying “I know how you’re feeling”. We do not WANT people to say things that take away our uniqueness. And in the same way, we don’t want others to ‘accept’ us in their circle, because we do not need anyone’s approval for that.

Being an introvert and a left-handed person, I am very used to being judged and asked hilarious questions like, “Were you always like this?” or “Why don’t you become ‘normal’ sometimes?

So, while everyone has been busy normalizing the standards of what people should be like, I have been basking in my uniqueness. I do not want to ‘mix’ in a crowd that believes in chicanery and dumping people who don’t fit in their idea of being “normal”. No one gave them a right to do so. And to me, I am the only person to whom I need to prove my worth, because after all,

Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind” – Bernard M. Baruch

 

Choosing Happiness…

I’m trying to make changes in my life,
By shuffling my distorted priority lines,
Into something that will not make me cry,
Into something that makes me smile inside.

I’m thinking of changing my lifestyle;
Changing some bad routines that got me caught in times
Of when I hated myself and everything about me,
So, I’m making the change of leaving these behind me.

I am trying to figure out the shape of my happiness,
Trying to sketch it in monochromatic colors;
I love lot of things but I’m scared if they get attention,
They might become distorted, like everything else.

I have to make this change,
I don’t want it any other way;
I just want to make use of this space
The time’s giving me to comprehend
Who I am and what I like,
What I want and how it’ll be like,
And I can see my vision in and out of my dreams,
So, this time I can’t go risk free.

I’m planning things out, I’m prepping up;
No routines make me idle,
Bad ones make me busy;
I’m confused, I’m confused,
I’m confused about the plan;
But no one else will make this jump,
It’s all I have.

But I’m stubborn enough and wise enough,
Enough to be sure I need this change.
So, I’ll give all my bad habits a break,
And make this choice instead.